The First Month

I've made it one month through with being seperated from Rich. The month certainly hasn't been easy, nor is it close to being over with. I actually have done pretty well over all. The first part of the month I got the good news that my disease is back in remission. I got to come off my medication which was AWESOME!! I was so happy to get that news, but also a little nervous. So far, I feel pretty good without even though it's only been a couple weeks. I have a check up in three months to make sure everything is still going well. Hopefully it will be. On that same day I went to see my other doctor since I did an increase on my anti-depressent. I bawled the whole time I was in the office, but I guess that's what doctors are for. For now, I am staying on the same dosage of medication until things hopefully even out in the emtional area. As I said, overall I seem to being doing pretty good, but there are "those" moments! Moments such as having to sign divorce papers. I DIDN'T want a divorce which all my friends and family know. However, some people seem to think that this should be just an easy thing to get through. This is NOT the case!! The pain from this event in my life is like no other!! I have been through my fair share of physical pain and this feels nothing like anything I have ever experienced! I miss Rich and the companionship I had with that. More than that though, I'm angry that he broke promises to me!! Not just to me, but to God! Makes me so angry and hurt inside!! What seems to be helping though is having my friends and family. That and a job even though it's very part-time!! At least it's getting me out and about from time to time and doing things. I still am thinking about doing the home daycare things. Just need to get going more on it. In the meantime, the part-time job is fun and the Avon selling is going pretty well. Better than the Mary Kay selling at one time went. I have also been on date since Rich and I split. It was WAY to early to date!! However, I did meet someone that could become a good friend. I just wasn't interested in anything romantic at this point and to be honest, at this point I can't see myself with anyone else!